After a classic Texas Tech “let’s do average in the first half and then blow the opponent outta the water in the second” performance, we’re moving on to the round of 32! Texas Tech is picking up more national attention with the expanded efforts of Culver’s 29 points and Owen’s five blocks. The icing on this publicity cake is that their opponent tomorrow night has been a vastly under observed basketball team that only has three losses on the season. These over-achieving try hards will be meeting up against a team that has earned a spot on a number of journalists’ Final Four picks (oh wow). The defensive wall of Texas Tech will be berated tomorrow evening against theeeeeeEEeeEeeEeEe...

“EXPENSIVE, LEANER HAMBURGER OPTIONS”

Mark J. Rebilas-USA TODAY Sports

Come on, when you go to Twisted Root or another burger place/shopping mart that offers alternative meat choices - you wanna try new things. Bison is fantastic! It kinda matches the success that the University at Buffalo has had in basketball this season. They’re currently 32-3 on the season and ranked 19th in KenPom’s rankings with and AdjO at 19th and an AdjD at 28th. The expensive, leaner hamburger options are causing a buzz in the NCAA tournament after their thrashing of Arizona State 91-74. But who cares about that? You’ve got a regular preview you can read (thanks Jacob), but here in this Anti-Preview we cover what matters. TO THE NEWS!

WHAT SHOULD YOU BE DRINKING?

This recipe comes from our reader, HarvJNep2n, who swears that they don’t watch the Ellen Show. But, for the record, they totally do. Here’s an ode to Ellen’s mascot challenge and HarvJNep2n’s decision to christen the hilarious renaming of Raider Red to something derogatory but fun:

The Hillbilly Elmo over ice:

1 shot bourbon

1 shot amaretto

5 dashes Angostura Bitters

Top with Crabbie’s alcoholic ginger beer.

To be honest I have never heard of Crabbie’s so if you’re like me, a loser, then here’s what that bottle looks like. The Hillybilly Elmo’s official motto is “It tasted good until Villanova happened.” So drink up and be sure to let me know your review in the comments.

WHAT SHOULD YOU BE EATING?

Since I overloaded you guys last time, I decided to settle on one Tulsa fan-favorite. What better choice for a burger-able (yes that’s a word now, fight me) mascot than Fat Guys’ Burger Bar? This burger joint receives nothing but raving reviews about their burger-fare as well as their french fries. Something I have come to really enjoy on burgers lately is aioli, and Fat Guy’s apparently nails it. My favorite review written about Fat Guy’s Burger Bar is:

“Service was good. Tables were dirty and atmosphere was meh.

I would come back and would recommend to others.”

YOU HAVE TO BE VERY GOOD FOR SOMEBODY TO FOLLOW UP “meh” WITH “I would come back.” That’s an All-American experience if I’ve ever heard of one, so as Coach Beard would say, “go and watch America happen.”

BEST THING ABOUT THIS GAME?

After a fairly one-sided expectation by sports pundits and fans against Northern Kentucky, this Buffalo team has garnered a lot of attention for their dominating season (currently 32-3) and have some believing they’ll make a deep run this year. In the round of 32, there’s a lot of buzz stirring about this being the game to watch. Buffalo’s offensive abilities against Texas Tech’s defensive prowess? I don’t know but if history serves me right it was the hillbilly elmos of the great plains that about wiped out the bison population - not the other way around.

FIVE REASONS TO DISLIKE BUFFALO

1. Buffalo, if you didn’t know, sits right at the cusp between two very difficult areas of the Northern Hemisphere: Canada and New York. I have taken the liberty of labeling this map to illustrate perhaps more clearly what I mean. Buffalo is a unique blend that we can appropriately refer to as “Canankee,” and such the residents are “canankees.”

2. I found this on a... travel... website and I want to assume it’s satire, but I’ve listened to way too many true crime podcasts to know it’s not wrong:

“Do you like cold weather? Do you like getting pounded by snow? Does a weekend at the beach involve trying to wade through dead hookers in Lake Erie? If so, then you’ll love Buffalo.”

3. Bison are assholes. Watch this super accurate video of their aggression and how a national HERO valiantly saves his family from dying. In his minivan.

4. Their fans? They’re too nice (on the internet). I’ve combed all over and can’t find a single piece of spite or cockiness or what-have you to lump their entire fan base under. Please, Buffalo fans, give me some effort here.

5. This is getting pretty difficult with teams that are not prominent athletic schools, because nobody wants to go out of their way to tear them down. ENJOY IT BUFFALO, if you keep winning then I’ll have better material.

5:10pm tomorrow night, LET’S RIDE!