Yoooo, it is Thursday, and that means it is time for your favorite read of the week (but maybe a day late). Yup, time for the anti-preview! Last week’s loss to Texas was a giant bummer, but don’t fret Red Radiers, greener pastures lie ahead.
WAIT. HOW OLD IS BILL SNYDER?
The year is 2050, Bill Snyder is still coach of the Kansas State Wildcats, somehow he has managed to use the heads from Futurama to magically extend his coaching career. No, this is a very unlikely scenario. But it brings up the question: How long has this dude been coaching? 1962. You read that right, the guy was coaching football back when we first reached the freakin’ moon. Take that, Russia. But (Spoiler Alert) it wont be enough to best the Red Raiders on Saturday.
WHAT YOU SHOULD BE DRINKING
ZQuil, because it is purple and because this game is going to be a total snooze fest. Just kidding, please don’t do that.. But I’m going to give you a recipe that could be just as dangerous... Have you ever had an “Adios Mother F*****?”
Vodka - 1⁄2 oz
Rum - 1⁄2 oz
Tequila - 1⁄2 oz
Gin - 1⁄2 oz
Blue Curacao liqueur - 1⁄2 oz
Sweet and sour mix - 2 oz
Cranberry Juice - to taste (Usually this is made with a club soda, but this makes it purple and tasty)
WHAT YOU SHOULD BE EATING
Unfortunately, a google search for “wildcat recipes” yielded strange results. But I have another idea: Bierock. Now, I may or may not have picked this because I’ve heard it been pronounced “beer rocks.” Beer totally rocks, but so do these German inspired hamburger hot pockets. For good reasons, these are local favorite in Kansas, and you should probably try one too. Here’s a recipe if you’re as stoked as I am to chow down on these.
THE BEST PART OF THE GAME
This is a total rebound game for the Red Raiders. Coming off three straight losses, we finally get a softball in Kansas State. I’m pretty confident that no matter who starts at QB, we got this. Kansas State’s comes into this game with the 116th best offense that cant seem to get anything going. If you have been waiting to rage after a nice win, this may be your opportunity.
FIVE REASONS TO HATE KANSAS STATE
- Watching Kansas State play football is only slightly more entertaining than watching paint dry. Seriously, watching a NCAA team from Kansas play football is dismal.
- Wildcats? How unoriginal. Just to name a few of the other Wildcats out there: Arizona, Davidson, Kentucky, Northwestern, Villanova. You get the point.
- They have been surpassed by Kansas University and are now officially both the worst team in the Big 12 and the state of Kansas. I guess that’s not really a reason to hate Kansas State, but I really wanted to sprinkle that in somewhere. You’re welcome
- Bill Snyder criticized one of the only decent players on his team. After Isaiah Zuber made a costly fumble against TCU, Synder said “It wasn’t special teams so much as it was one individual,” Snyder said after the game. “You take away the turnover that gave them the winning touchdown and we are talking about a different thing right now.” Low Class.
- Bill Snyder family stadium. What a mess. Just last season there were rumors that Bill Snyder was being forced out as head coach. But they went ahead and named a stadium after him while he was still the head coach. To make things worse, there is the assumption that his son, Sean, will be the next head coach despite ever holding a coordinator position. Yikes.
AT THE END OF THE DAY
Texas Tech and Kliff Kingsbury really need to win these next two games. This team needs to get to a decent bowl or things could get ugly for Kingsbury and company. However, I expect the Red Raiders to take care of business on Saturday.