Enjoy this night you fightin' Texas Aggies. Enjoy the serenity of the live oak trees calmly swayin in the wind. Enjoy the dove flying, looking for shelter from drunken hunters. Enjoy the serenity as the sun sets over the horizon on another beautiful late summer Texas night.
This is your night. This is the night where you hold the promise of a new and better day in your clinched, calloused hands. Revel in this night. This is your night for change.
Bask in this glory now, because tomorrow this memory will be all you have. No more late summer Texas sunsets to enjoy. No more dove hunts. No more Texas rivalries. No more camo and comradery. We grew up together. We ate breakfast at the local diner together. We hunted in the fall and argued about football year round. We farmed and raised our kids and drank Lone Star Beer together.
Tomorrow, that's gone. All that history is gone. But at least you'll have this:
YOU'RE GONNA HAVE YOUR ASSES HANDED TO YOU WEEK IN AND WEEK OUT AND I DON'T CARE HOW FANCY YOUR NEW SB NATION BLOG IS YOU'RE GONNA BE IN SO MUCH PAIN FROM HAVING TO LIVE THROUGH THAT SEC SCHEDULE AFTER ALL THE SHIT YOU'VE BEEN TALKIN' FOR THE PAST FEW MONTHS I USED TO THINK OF MYSELF AS SOMEONE THAT ADMIRED THE AGGIES AND WHAT YOUR TRYING TO DO BUT I REALIZED TONIGHT THAT YOU GUYS ARE ABOUT TO TASTE SOME REAL PAIN AND ALL THE WHILE YOU'RE SENDING OUT PICTURES OF THE NEW SEC LOGO ON YOUR STADIUM AND TRYING TO NAME KYLE FIELD THE "HATE BARN" AND WHAT THE HELL IS A "HATE BARN" ANYWAY? PEOPLE THAT HAVEN'T BEEN TO THE DIXIE CHICKEN HEAR "HATE BARN" AND THINK SCARY THINGS, LIKE WTF? WTF IS GOING ON INSIDE THAT HATE BARN? I DON'T EVEN WANT TO KNOW, BECAUSE I WANT TO KEEP AT LEAST AN OUNCE OF INNOCENCE IN THIS OLD BODY EVEN THOUGH I'VE SEEN FIRE AND I'VE SEEN RAIN.
YOU WON'T EVEN BE ABLE TO GO DOVE HUNTING NEXT YEAR BECAUSE YOU'LL BE ALL ABOUT THE GATORS AND NOODLING FOR CATFISH AND STUPID SEC SHIT. HAVE FUN AGGIES, HAVE FUN IN YOUR NEW WORLD. DID YOU KNOW THAT THEY ARE STILL BATTLING THE HATFIELDS AND MCCOYS IN THAT PART OF THE COUNTRY? I KNOW BECAUSE I WATCHED THE SHOW ON THE HISTORY CHANNEL WITH KEVIN COSTNER AND IT WAS SO AWESOME AND I KNOW IT'S MORE ABOUT WEST VIRGINIA BUT I DON'T CARE BECAUSE I STILL WORRY A LITTLE ABOUT YOU AGGIES AND WANT YOU TO KNOW WHAT YOU ARE GETTING INTO. THE HATFIELDS AND MCCOYS WERE SOME CRAZY BASTARDS AND YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT EVERY WEEK. WE ONLY HAVE TO DEAL WITH IT ONCE A YEAR WHEN HOLGO COMES TO TOWN BUT YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH IT EVERY WEEK AND IT MAKES ME A LITTLE SAD.
YOU GUYS HAVEN'T WON SHIT IN YEARS AND YOU BECAME THE THIRD OR FOURTH TEAM IN THE STATE OF TEXAS SO YOU DECIDED, HELL, WE'LL JUST BREAK ALL THIS TRADITION AND MOVE TO THE SEC AND ALL THE SUDDEN KIRK HERBSTREIT IS WALKING AROUND CAMPUS AND YOU GUYS ARE LIKE "LOOK AT US, THIS IS ALL WE HAD TO DO" WHO CARES ABOUT WINNING! ALL WE HAD TO DO WAS MOVE TO THE SEC AND NOW WE'RE AS FAMOUS AS KIM KARDASHIAN BUT NOWHERE NEAR AS HOT ESPECIALLY IN THAT EPIC BLACK SWIMSUIT I SAW HER WEARING ON THE INTERNET YESTERDAY. WE HAVEN'T WON SHIT IN TWENTY YEARS BUT GAMEDAY IS HERE AND LEE CORSO MIGHT TAKE A PISS ON LIVE TV AND DESMOND HOWARD WILL BE WEARING A SOLID GOLD SUIT AND THAT SHIT ONLY HAPPENS IN COLLEGE STATION BABY! SEC!
So, as I was saying, enjoy this serenity. Enjoy your new found attention and your new blog with all the charts and SB Nation fawning over you. Relax on this night, as your new life begins tomorrow.
It's SEC Eve, and you have no idea what you're getting into. Hatfields and McCoys and shoving your hand in a hole in the river and hoping you catch a huge catfish and not some sort of ancient sea monster. Have fun.
And P.S. You're not invited to the dove hunt next year. Enjoy shooting alligators with a rifle.