FanPost

When Opportunity Knocks


Don't hide under the bed.  You've gotta answer the damn door because it's not always the pizza guy- it could be opportunity!

This job market is tough.  Millions are in search of employment and the competition is fierce, but for a fortunate few the search is easy.  Those with specific talents and a unique skill set are highly sought.  The blue chip prospects are flooded with an endless barrage of offers and promises.  Like the most talented high school football stars, high performing employees are recruited heavily.  Luckily, I am one of those blue chip prospects.  I don't have to search on my own because opportunity is constantly knocking at my inbox.

Headhunters seek me out daily and have wowed me with their professionalism and unbelievable offers.  I sort through them all and daydream about the exciting career that awaits me.  Here are just a few of the career opportunities I've received.


Good day,
I am the agent of TheUSAddress company. Headhunter reported us that you are seeking for a work, for this reason I would like to propose you an opportunity to take the vacancy of Shipping Agent. Our organization deals with post transfer around the world and now our company are expanding a new staff to meet customers' requests. If you are goal-oriented, ready to work on the result, laborious, we will be glad to consider you as a candidate for this vacancy.
Our requirements are:
full legal age,
possibility to work in USA,
computer skills Word, Excel.
In return we can offer you a stable profit and career growth. If you take an interest in this vacancy and would like to know the details, please, email us at ________

In the reply, please provide your contact information to reach you.
Have a good day!

Can you say "dream job"?  TheUSAdress company has to be in the Fortune 500 and they want me!  What strikes me about this opportunity are the skills necessary for success.  I am goal-oriented and I'm always ready to work on the result.  And, my best friends will swear that I am nothing if not laborious.  I am so glad that headhunter reported that I am seeking for a work and that this great company are expanding a new staff!  When can I start!  Will I get a company car?

But the headhunter didn't stop his reporting to us there.  Headhunter also presented me with this:

Hi,

Headhunter reported us that you were searching for a job. I am the member of FWS company and would like to offer you an ability to occupy the vacansy of Financial Assistant. Our organization deals with online
website growth and promotion in Europe over many years. Now, we are expanding our interest area in USA. To meet all our customer's interests, we
need to be good organized and highly motivated command. So, we are seeking for an ambitious and responsible worker for this post. We do not require
any special education, because we believe you can do your best over the
work process. All you need is full legal age, possibility to work
in USA, a computer and relevant skills to work with it, and also will to
achieve your goals together with us.

If you take an interest in this post and would like to know more detailed information,
please, email us to __________ . In the letter, you should mention your contact
information to reach you if we need to.

Have a good day!

I am sooo interested in the ability to occupy the vacansy of Financial Assistant.  And again, I meet all the requirements.  I am good organized and highly motivated command.  I also have documentation proving my possibility to work in USA, and I can definitely do my best over the work process. I am glad they are expanding their interest in USA.  We need more expanding interest in USA!

 FWS company seems like a good fit, but there are so many other choices, including:

Hi!

We are seeking for new people who can control the correspondence in your area.

Responsibilities are accepting and sending post,goods examination and sending documents on each parcel.

Minimum requirements to employees!

If you are interested in this position reply to us sending your contact information to e-mail: _______

Best regards

Controlling the correspondence in my area? How effin' cool is that?  This could be a very sexy job!  Will I be an international spy? Do I get a special agent code name? Will my pen be a gun?  Is there a 401k?  

I am especially drawn to the fact that they are so excited about their minimum requirements to employees!  Minimum requirements!  We don't have 'em!  Come join us and be an international spy!  With a 401k and a pen gun!

 Then I heard from Diego Garcia Garcia and my heart stopped:

We have found your profile at a job board website and consider you as a promising employee.
This employment opportunity does not need for any investment and you will not need to give for anything out of your own pocket. No sales either.
Let me know if you're  concern about a part-time job via this email: _______ . Then i will send you a completed  information.

Mr. Garcia Garcia, sign me up!  Any job that does not need for any investment or not need to give for anything out of my own pocket is a job for me!  Please send me a completed information!  Can I call you Diego, or do you prefer Mr. Garcia Garcia? I am concern!

And recently, Artur Crown reached out to me:

Tom Edwards,

UK Translogic is hiring for the post of Package coordinator! IPS stands for "UK Translogic " and it is part of the TCS Micro Limited group.

As an Package coordinator, you will be working from home, as an independent  employee. We expect our Package coordinators to overseeing customers’ package sending procedures.
Salary - $40000 every year, paid in parts, every month.

If you want to know more information about this vacancy, please reply on this email. We will contact you in 1-2 business days.

Artur Crown, UK Translogic  Human Resources dpt.

Of course, I was mildly concerned that the email was addressed to Tom Edwards because that's not my name, but who cares?  $40,000 every year, paid in parts, every month?  Oh, man, the possibilities! Plus, now I know that IPS stands for UK Translogic.  I always wondered what IPS stood for.  I'll probably turn this one down though because I'm not well trained in overseeing customers' package sending procedures.  I knew I should've changed my major.

 

Headhunter_medium

So, as you can see, my options are endless.  Headhunter reaches out everyday and does the legwork for me. My only work is deciding which sweet job to sign up for. 

Tough decisions have to be made, but I'm ready to make 'em.  My future is calling!

And when you hear that knocking on your door, make sure to answer.  It could be opportunity disguised as headhunter, or it could be Dominos.  The key is you don't know until you answer.

But it's probably Dominos.

<em>This is a FanPost and does not necessarily reflect the views of Viva The Matadors' writers or editors. It does reflect the views of this particular fan though, which is as important as the views of Viva The Matadors' writers or editors.</em>

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