I hereby announce my intent to join the chorus of supporters and joyously leap into the collective rush to deify the accomplishments of the currently 7th ranked receiver on the team.
This role model to children everywhere, and sixth year senior, is on pace to equal peaks of production not seen since his third freshman (15) and first sophomore seasons (17).
We witness the rebirth of the fallen son, who buried in lies of his own making and scorned by those who rejected such lies, now somehow unapologeticly rises unscathed by his past deeds to face his oppressors.
Alone in this barren land, only one man will stand beside him - the kind of man who would not tolerate the same behavior from those with lesser fathers, the kind of man who is willing to manufacture a narrative that serves his interests, the only kind of man that would would be willing to conveniently forgive, so that others might one day hopefully forget.
The paragon of virtue that stands before us today may once have lied, required grown men to suspend disbelief, and shattered the spirit of a once unified nation (including perhaps even a few doors).
But as I swear by the only God that stands before me, those four receptions against Oklahoma which increased our embattled One's reception average from 1.3 catches per the game all the way to 1.7 catches per game, has forever removed whatever malice I may have harbored in the depths of my heart.
For this man-child need not be a teller a truths, a master of his own fate, or even one who - God forbid -deigns to accept the consequences of his own actions.
By all that we hold sacred and for so long as he shall wear the scarlet and black, such trivialities matter not.
This leader of men is a Red Raider.
For those who continue to disbelieve, remember this. It is his brothers in arms, and only his brothers in arms, most of whom are not old enough to legally purchase alcohol, who reserve the right to pass judgment.
The rest of you who cling to your own beliefs, trust your ability to read sworn affidavits, and value your life experiences over the vested interest of those who seek to wish the past away merely waste your own breath.
To those who refuse to let go of your hate, I say to you, you can have your Academic All-American receiver Alex Torres. Take your former OU recruit, Eric Ward, and his 44 team leading receptions. Enjoy the once Next Mr. Crabtree and now forever injured Darrin Moore.
Begone with your Cornelius Douglas, who without his 27 catches would merely be a fairground delicacy barely worth the three packets of mustard smeared across its crispy exterior and served on a stick.
Take with you your Jacoby Franks who may finally have emerged as the reliable receiver you had always thought he would be. When it came time to face the Crimson and Cream menace, he was but a question mark hiding on the injured list.
And finally, you may even have your lovable Eric Stephens, who, but not for a vicious late hit that resulted in a season ending injury, would likely be the team's most valuable player. The feats of this once feared competitor have been reduced to a milestone for our new hero to reach in 12 games what Mr Stephens accomplished while moonlighting as a feature back in 6.
These players might be more talented. They might have better production. They might even be better people.
But on that cold night in October, with the team clinging to a 17 point half time lead, only one voice spoke up. And it was His (or so we are told).
Steeled by the raw passion of their brother-in-arms, His comrades would proceed to be outscored 31-14 over the remainder of the contest.
This, you see, is how legends are born.
And history was thus made.
Out of the rubble of boos heaped upon him by the peers who know him best, a new youngish hero emerged.
So while the rest of you wrestle with your precious moral ambiguity, His feats will be memorialized by the scribes who are paid to write them (or else).
Years from now, when the thrill of victory has long receded, we will still recall this glorious day and think to ourselves, "Never has so much been written about so little."